


Of Burlap and Brain-Teasers

by wanderingoverthewords



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alcohol, Canon-Typical Violence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:22:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28096095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderingoverthewords/pseuds/wanderingoverthewords
Summary: Snippets of the life shared between Jonathan Crane and Edward Nygma.[50 Sentence challenge]
Relationships: Jonathan Crane/Edward Nygma
Comments: 3
Kudos: 33





	Of Burlap and Brain-Teasers

**Author's Note:**

> Characters: Edward Nygma, Jonathan Crane/Scarecrow, unnamed policeman, Robin, Batman, Bernie, Query, Echo, Jon’s crow posse, Edward’s father, Harley Quinn, Edward’s tailor, Riddlerbots, Selina Kyle.
> 
> Pairing: Jonathan Crane/Edward Nygma.
> 
> Warnings: alcohol use, bodily harm, firearm usage, mental breakdown, forced drugging (fear toxin), blood, NSFW topics; implied homophobia; mentioned death, smoking, murder, threats, kidnapping.
> 
> Notes: I’m a sucker for these stupid things, they’re a good challenge, and it’s been too long since I’ve posted anything, so here’s this. Based off things that have happened and things that will happen in my Scriddler series, with minimal spoilers.
> 
> A WanderVerse fic.
> 
> All material belongs to DC Comics (although my interpretations of the characters are used).

**1 - Comfort -**

Edward knows this fix is temporary, but if downing a baby bottle of scotch will spare him the heartache of yet another of Crane’s rejections, then so be it.

**2 - Kiss -**

Their first is hilariously hesitant on Jonathan’s part, Edward can _feel_ him berating himself for locking lips with a colleague; it serves as a preview of the breaking of barriers in their relationship, and that only excites Edward more.

**3 - Soft -**

Jonathan scoffs at the amount of lotions and potions Edward has in both bathrooms, but if they’re the things keeping his brown locks so pleasant for Jonathan to run his fingers through, then he never wants Edward to grow tired of using them.

**4 - Pain -**

It’s when Jonathan is complaining about his aching body that Edward grows most frustrated with Scarecrow as he simply can’t understand how Scarecrow doesn’t realise the damage he’s doing to the one he’s supposed to be protecting.

**5 - Potatoes -**

Edward looks over his shoulder at Jonathan and watches as he peels the spuds for dinner; there’s a joke about Jonathan’s childhood on his tongue, but he chooses not to share it and instead contemplates the domesticity of the situation.

**6 - Rain -**

The rain is heavy and litters the lenses of Edward’s glasses, but it doesn’t block the sight of the fear in the policeman’s eyes as Edward points his own gun at him, nor does it drown out Robin’s commands for Jonathan to keep his eyes open or Batman’s attempts to talk Edward down.

**7 - Chocolate -**

“Oh, fer _God’s sake,”_ Jonathan says immediately upon seeing the bundles of flowers and boxes of sweets adorning his porch, each with a slip of card with a question mark stamped on (as if he needs to be _told_ who has left these here).

**8 - Happiness -**

For the longest time, Bernie had been the only living thing that could lift Jonathan’s spirits when he’d been discontent; he can’t quite remember when it came to be that Edward is the second.

**9 - Telephone -**

“I took the liberty of putting _my_ number in there, should you ever need me,” Edward says and ignores the incredulous look on Jonathan’s face at such a prospect as the scientist turns the gift over in his hands.

**10 - Ears -**

In the morning, they hear Edward only mumble sadly in response to them; in the afternoon, they hear revived determination in the form of a new plan to woo Jonathan Crane; in the evening, they hear him mope and whine about how that plan should have worked and surely, Jonathan is madly in love with him by now, and while Echo is perfectly content to help Edward think of the next plan, Query wishes he’d hike up his big boy pants and ask Crane out _properly._

**11 - Name -**

“Perish the thought,” Edward replies to Jonathan’s dismissal, watching the murder of crows grouped before them, each bird with a different coloured tag on their leg, “I’d _like_ to know their names.”

**12 - Sensual -**

It takes ages before Jonathan allows Edward to massage his shoulders like Edward had wanted, but when it finally happens, Jonathan is so relaxed that he almost falls asleep; Edward is certain that - besides sex - this is the most intimately Jonathan has ever been touched, and it makes his heart burst to know he’s the first ever allowed to.

**13 - Death -**

Edward and Scarecrow’s feud can end in no other way.

**14 - Sex -**

Of all the changes to Jonathan’s lifestyle that Edward has influenced, getting him from having sex four times a year to four times a _week_ is definitely amongst Edward’s favourites.

**15 - Touch -**

That had been the first wall to break down and while it’d been far from demolished, Edward had known they were making progress when Jonathan had silently offered his hand to be held while they sat together reading.

**16 - Weakness -**

Edward observes Jonathan through the bars of the latter’s cell, watches Jonathan rock back and forth as he recites the periodic table to distract himself from the absence of Scarecrow’s voice in his mind, then he scoffs in disgust and inserts the key into the lock.

**17 - Tears -**

During the very rare times he cries, Edward always covers his face, turns away and demands nobody look at him, and this time is no different, so as much as Jonathan wants to continue taking in Edward’s (accidental) toxin-induced stupor, he has enough decency in him to do as he’s told, if only because it’s Edward. 

**18 - Speed -**

“Jonathan, if you don’t hurry up, I’m leaving you behind,” Edward calls over his shoulder at his lover, who is too distracted by the fearful reactions of their victims to move right away.

**19 - Wind -**

“So, anyway,” Jonathan says as Edward continues to cackle at the mental image of Jonathan frantically chasing his hat while simultaneously _being_ chased by Batman, “that’s why we don’t wear the hat anymore.”

**20 - Freedom -**

That’s one of the few things about Gotham that he truly, truly enjoys: the only reason he and Edward get looks during their (admittedly, few and far between) moments of PDA is because of their reputations, and not their genders.

**21 - Life -**

He’s far from dying of old age, but a part of Jonathan does wish he and Edward could have met sooner, if only so he could’ve spent a larger percentage of his time alive in their current situation, but he’ll take what he can get.

**22 - Jealousy -**

Edward resists the urge to laugh as he sees the way the gentleman’s gaze keeps drifting away from him; he knows Jonathan is staring at the unwanted visitor over his shoulder (because that’s all Jonathan _needs_ to do), and suddenly Edward’s admirer is making excuses to leave.

**23 - Hands -**

Like the rest of his appearance, Jonathan’s hands inspire thoughts of stereotypical fairytale villains - with their slim palms and twig-like, scarred digits - but Edward can only smile as he plays with Jonathan’s fingers, for he is the only person that knows of the gentle and pleasurable touches they’re capable of.

**24 - Taste -**

Edward blanches and turns his head away from Jonathan’s to break their kiss, saying into the hand he uses to wipe his lips, “I _told_ you, I hate when you _smoke_ before kissing me.”

**25 - Devotion -**

Jonathan sits and points his gun at the back of the man’s head from the rooftop opposite the man’s window; it’s all he ever does, for only upon Edward deciding to enact revenge on his father or that he wants Jonathan to handle it will he go to meet Lawrence Nashton face-to-face.

**26 - Forever -**

“As has always been the way,” Jonathan replies to the drunken Edward, who casually tells him he’ll kill Jonathan if he leaves him.

**27 - Blood -**

He hasn’t felt fear in ages, but _something_ makes him hope that that isn’t Edward’s own blood coating his back and dripping down his arm, but of course he knows it is, and Scarecrow confirms this by letting him listen to the echoes of pained screams as his scythe had cut through Edward’s flesh.

**28 - Sickness -**

“Die quietly,” Jonathan had told him amidst his coughing fit, and Edward lays in bed thinking of exactly which death-trap he’d like to stick Jonathan in, then Jonathan delivers to him soup made from a recipe from his childhood, and Edward decides that maybe he’d been too quick to think his lover so heartless (then Jonathan finds _amusement_ in how Edward chokes on the soup’s spiciness, and Edward reconsiders the death-trap idea).

**29 - Melody -**

Edward plays his violin for himself, mostly, as the sound soothes his nerves and helps him calm; he opens his eyes to find Jonathan seated on the couch in front of him with a book in his lap - an excuse for coming out of his study, Edward knows - and Edward wonders, distantly, what it would take to convince Jonathan to duet with him on his guitar.

**30 - Star -**

Jonathan sighs irritably and eyes his research as Edward talks and talks and _talks;_ why can’t Edward realise that while he may be the main character in his own mind, he is currently nothing more than an extra in Jonathan’s?

**31 - Home -**

Relief spreads through him as he first steps into the house after two weeks in Arkham Asylum, but all is not right until he hears Edward’s voice call out to him.

**32 - Confusion -**

“Yeah, Eddie, she’s, like, Doctah Crane’s favourite thing,” Harley whispers to him, and Edward has never felt more _baffled_ as he watches the big, bad Dr. Crane coo at the tiny mouse that he’s happily feeding pizza crust to.

**33 - Fear -**

Of all the hundreds upon hundreds of reactions Jonathan has seen to his toxin, Edward’s is by far the most alluring and the most beautiful, and Jonathan simply can’t _help_ but withhold the antidote for just a few minutes more. 

**34 - Lightning/Thunder -**

Jonathan’s reflexes, however unnaturally graceful, are sharp and fast as he strikes at Batman with his sickle, which brings out more booming laughter from Edward at the other end of the room as he continues shouting encouragement to Jonathan to take the Dark Knight down (of course, the storm eventually subsides, and both are dragged back to Arkham). 

**35 - Bonds -**

When most frustrated with Jonathan’s lack of affection toward him, Edward has to remind himself of one thing: Jonathan has had family (he thinks, Jonathan never talks about them), he has had friends (as much as he likes to say he only has Scarecrow), but he has _never_ had a boyfriend before Edward.

**36 - Market -**

“Oooh, now _this,”_ Edward says, holding the blood red fabric to Jonathan’s chest as Jonathan continues to frown at the wall, resisting the urge to kick Edward’s tailor away as she measures his leg, _“this_ would look _lovely_ on you.”

**37 - Technology -**

“I have just unveiled to you a technological _marvel_ in the form of robots that understand and follow the concept of religion, in which they view not only me as their God, but you as their respective Jesus (obviously, without the father/son connection between us), in order to ensure that they will carry out our and _only_ our orders, and all you can manage to reply with is _‘Hmm,’,”_ Edward rants, then turns to his group of Riddlerbots, “which proves to me, yet again, that my genius is _wasted_ in this household.”

**38 - Gift -**

“Jonathan Crane of Earth, you have the ability to instill _great fear,”_ Edward says, then makes a whooshing sound effect with his lips as he guides the replica, glow-in-the-dark Sinestro Corps ring onto Jonathan’s middle finger, “welcome to the Sinestro Corps - and happy anniversary, from your beloved Edward.”

**39 - Smile -**

The smile stretches thin and wide across his lover’s face, and Edward goes scrambling for his gun because he knows it is not _Jonathan_ who smiles like _that._

**40 - Innocence -**

Selina’s shoulders shake with oncoming laughter at Jonathan’s confusion then creeping realisation over the purpose of the vibrating, question mark-shaped item in his hand, then said laughter becomes _impossible_ to hold back when Edward pokes his head into the room and says, “Oh, Jon, why’re you holding one of my vibrators?”

**41 - Completion -**

They would never say the other completed them (not without a great deal of sarcasm), but they have definitely brought... _something_ to each other’s life that they would rather not do without.

**42 - Clouds -**

Edward has never thought much of fear toxin, but seeing the orange gas spread through Gotham’s streets on Halloween night only has him feeling _elated_ at his lover’s success, and so he laughs behind his gas mask.

**43 - Sky -**

Their spot - atop the building that they had talked about pushing each other off of - quickly becomes one of Edward’s favourite places to be with Jonathan, despite the cold, for there is nothing up there but the air, the sky, and them.

**44 - Heaven -**

No such thing awaits them, even if they did believe, with all the things they’d done in their lives, but what they have now, together on earth, is enough for either.

**45 - Hell -**

“Ain’t nothin’ of interest down there; Scarecrow and I said a long time ago we’d never go back,” Jonathan says stiffly during one of the few conversations he and Edward have about Arlen, “an’ I have yet ta think of a reason we’d want to.”

**46 - Sun -**

Edward awakens early, Jonathan’s arm around his waist and nose pressed into his neck, and watches the light grow gradually behind their curtains, letting the minutes tick by, then he smiles lazily as he feels Jonathan begin to stir behind him.

**47 - Moon -**

A gap in their curtains lets the moonlight peek within, bathing Edward’s creamy skin and making it practically glow in a display of ethereal elegance, and Jonathan can’t seem to help but lean over and kiss the question mark tattoo on his bare shoulder blade as Edward continues to sleep.

**48 - Waves -**

“Jonathan Crane,” Edward calls from where he stands ankle-deep in the ocean, hands on his hips, “I did not whisk you off to Hawaii to watch you sit on your ass all day, so get out of that chair and join me in the water this instant.”

**49 - Hair -**

It might be because of his affinity for older men, but honestly, Edward loves the dashes of grey amongst Jonathan’s (already much-loved) ginger hair.

**50 - Supernova -**

The fuse had been lit when Edward had returned home to find his living room in tatters, Query and Echo injured and Jonathan missing; it had burned considerably when he found out the accomplices had had his Jonathan shot, but it had eventually run out when Jonathan’s fate had been revealed to him, and so nobody should have been surprised when Edward finally exploded.


End file.
